Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Just A Few More Reasons To Dislike Hillary Clinton: An AB.com MultiMedia Exposé - Sponsored By Walmart™


At AB.com, I've made no bones about my distrust of the Clintons, and why I don't feel Hillary is worth my vote, should she miraculously steal win the Democratic nomination. Of course, after losing 10 straight contests, she's about as likely to win the election as my Washington Wizards are to win the NBA title this year. For the NBA-unhip, that means it's technically possible, but prolly won't happen. On that note, I present to you, the first (last?) evar AB.com MultiMedia Exposé Sponsored By Walmart™ - A Few More Reasons To Dislike Hillary Clinton.

EXHIBIT A: Pander Express


Last week, in the wake of that Potomac Primary a$$-whipping, I sagely predicted that Hillary would step up her Pander-game for the great state of Texas. No sooner than you can say Nachos BellGrande, out comes Mrs. Black President with a junior mariachi band member.

Ceasar Chavez is crying inside.

EXHIBIT B: Black Kids Are Not Feelin' This Campaign Either.


Sick and tired of being used as props for Black History Month photo ops, black kids are revolting at middle schools nationwide. Apparently Hillary doesn't recall that an 8 year old has no logical reference for the good ole' days of Clinton I. Nope, all Lil' Mama knows is "this white woman better get her hand off my shoulder, or somebody is bout' to catch a juicebox beatdown!"

EXHIBIT C: Corny Assed Campaign Theme Songs



As ya'll know, I was no fan of that godawful Will.I.Am produced "Yes, We Can" video. That was so bad it made me long for "We All In The Same Gang", which is no small feat. Still, the extreme douchebaggery of this ode-to-Clinton makes "Yes, We Can" sound like Songs In The Key Of Life by comparison.

EXHIBIT D: There's No Crying In Politricks!


Seriously, I'm for gender equity and all, but there's no excuse for this. Men can't cry publicly unless sports are involved and then only if they've just won a championship. Just google the name "darius washington" and tell me what you get back.

EXHIBIT E: Pander Express - The Sequel



Just when you thought it was same to go back to your neighborhood AME Zion Fourth Baptist Chuuuch of God's Disciples In Christ's Name Hallelujah, The Pander Express arrives and Hillary morphs into Shirley Ceasar.

EXHIBIT F: The Cackle



Like fingers on a chalkboard.

EXHIBIT G: The Walmart Factor.


Hillary and Bill have gotten rich off their ties to Walmart.

It's no surprise that Hillary is a strong supporter of free trade with China. Wal-Mart, despite its "Buy American" advertising campaign, is the single largest U.S. importer, and half of its imports come from China.

Remember this the next time she touts "bringing jobs back to America".

Wal-Mart’s First Lady [VillageVoice]

EXHIBIT H: Black Kids Are Not Feelin' This Campaign Either - The Sequel.


Ok, so I know that's not a Clinton, that's President Bush. But I've been holding onto that picture for months and needed to do something with it, so there. Still, even childrens' B.S. Meters go off over this type of politricks. You get my point either way.

Question: Do you have your own reasons for disliking Hillary Clinton? Pile on, you know where. Got more pics to add? Email em' to me. Link is above on right.

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