Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Ashy Or Classy?!? - My ***** Be Yankin'.

Let's face it, low as the commercial cRap music game is right now, things can only go up from here. I mean, between Lil' B, that "Toot It & Boot It" song, and whatever Hoe Hop™ song is currently poppin', it's not like we can reach any more creative valleys. Commercial cRap music been dead.

That said, every now and then, I come across something so bad it surprises even me, and believe me when I tell you I listen to a lot of bad music. So trust me when I say this one's right up there.

Go have a look and come back once you're done, assuming you make it past the 20 second mark.

[Editor's Warning: While nothing in this video is unsafe for work, it's just a wee bit over the top for me to run here on the front page. So, you'll need to scoot over to Les YouTubes if you have any interest in following the comments for this one. Sorry, but I gotta look out for my 9-to-5ers. I don't want anyone getting canned over me.]

Okay, now that you're back, lets count everything wrong with this musical abortion...

1) What the ham sammich is "yankin'"? Is this another case of just making up a word to see if it sticks, or do women actually go around extolling the yankeristic values of their goodies? Seeing that this "rapper" is affiliated with Plies, another guy who takes obscure regional slang (ie: his name) and makes it mainstream, I'm compelled to guess that this is a regular part of hoodrat lingo down in Ft. Myers.

2) I didn't know it was possible for a woman to have a more annoying voice than that one politician from Alaska, but this chick takes the cake. Congrats, sista.

3) Is it really necessary to have a bunch of dudes walking around in they drawls? Okay, ladies, I already know how hypocritical that sounds. Don't remind me.

4) Four Loko?!? Really?

5) Pickles?!? Really?

6) Being the least attractive woman in your video = #careerFAIL!!!

7) Flaming Hot Cheetos?!? Really?

8) Personally, I blame Michelle Obama.

9) Ok, no need to lie, I sorta like this song.

Question: Ashy or Classy?!? It "***** Be Yankin'" gonna make it to your iPod playlist, or is this some straight up trash with no redeeming artistic value whatsoever?!? Does "Lady" need to head back to her 3rd shift at Strokers, or should Everest College be in her immediate future plans instead?!?

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