Just in case you're curious. AB - Me, AS - My Wife AOB - My Oldest Brother, AMB - My Middle Brother, AA - My Aunt, ASL - My Sister In Law, ABL - My Brother In Law.
8:57pm
{Trey Songz does some MJ tribute. He struggles mightly with the teleprompter.}
AA - Stay in school.
AOB - Chris Brown stole his spot.
8:56pm
{NeYo wins some award.}
ZZZZZZZZZZZZ.
8:53pm
{Jamie Foxx wins some award}
AB - This is sorta like a perfect attendance award. You have to win something for just showing up.
8:49pm
{Soulja Boy performance. AverageInfant is glued to the screen.}
AB - Take my child in the other room, please.
{AS takes the baby away. He starts crying.}
ABL - Turn the swag off.
8:47pm
AB - Drake looks like that black guy who sells weed at all white suburban high schools.
AS - Not funny.
8:39pm
{Jamie Foxx performance}
AS - He is holding ALL of his package.
AA - All 5 inches of it.
AB - Puffy and his Ciroc product placement. Michael would be so pround.
{Snoop comes out}
AS - This sounds terrible. Why is Snoop out there?
AA - Big Ass Chain?!?!
AS - Ghetto t-shirt makers are gettin' paid this weekend.
AB - Is that chain real?
AOB - That's real.
AMB - Travis Barker?
ABL - He's killin' them drums.
AB - I guess you gotta do something to liven up a vocoder song.
8:37pm
AOB - Keke Palmer can sing.
AMB - She needs her teeth whitened.
AS - That's just wrong.
AB - Little Bobby J needs his own Nick Jr. show. Get this child a show before he hits a growth spurt.
8:35pm
{Frankie & Neffe promo}
AS - Crackheads.
AOB - Lookin' really crackish.
8:27pm
AB - NeYo is one of the few dudes who can do Michael some justice.
AS - Whoa, leave the hat ON!
ABL - He needs a wig. Wow!
AB - He sounds great.
AA - This is good.
AS - Wow.
AB - He should have written Michael's album.
AMB - He took off the hat to honor Mike.
AA - Why is Joe Jackson there?
8:22pm
{Keri Hilson performance}
AB - Somebody's got plumber's butt.
AS -She's got the Michael Jackson look.
AMB - She sounds terrible.
AB - She does absolutely nothing for me.
AS - She better not.
AB - {silence}
AS - This looks like some performing arts high school dance act.
AOB - She almost fell.
AA - This is boring.
AOB - She messed up.
AMB - BET sucks.
8:21pm
{Tiny & Toya promo plays}
AOB - Get that money. TI can't sell records forever.
AS - Is that girl really Lil' Wayne's ex-wife or just some wifey?
8:16pm
AB - Lil Wayne bought the whole Magnolia with him.
AOB - His daughter is 12 and she's already taller than him.
AS - Tyra is acting like she don't want no part of these clowns.
AMB - Ginuwine.
AS - He wore that suit is the "Pony" video.
AB - Ginuwine got him a Harold Pener Men Of Fashion Suit.
8:15pm
AS - Tyra's lacefront looks better tonight.
AOB - I don't like it.
AS - It's better than Beyonce's.
AOB - She looks like an alien.
{Lebron James wins an award}
AOB - Lebron's boy is lookin' at Tyra's butt.
AA - He needs some ennunciation lessons.
AB - Kobe is going to steal that award backstage.
8:10pm
AB - Does Lil' Wayne have custody, or is it just always his weekend when there's an award show?
{everyone tunes out Jamie Foxx's boring monologue...}
ASL - Aww shucks, moonwalking.
8:05pm
AOB - Oh God, this fool is in some skinny jeans!
AB - Ok, this is sorta funny.
ASL - Jamie looks old.
AA - Those are some tight pants. What is that thing on the back of his head?
8:00pm
Michael Jackson Montage. Shocker!
Wow, New Edition. They're going for the gold from the jump. Bobby too.
ABL - Is that Bobby?
AOB - That's Johnny Gill.
AB - There's 6 of em'.
ABL - That is Bobby. With a faux hawk.
AA - What is everyone getting a mohawk?
AB - That's the thing. That and skinny jeans.
AOB - That's Johnny on the guitar.
ASL - That was just okay.
AB - Ditto.
