Wednesday, November 5, 2008

What Would You Do? - Steal The Newspaper And Spoil The Child.

I have a tradition of collecting newspapers on notable dates in my life. I've got the one from the day I was born, my wedding, 9/11, various stuff about my Dad, and the birth of my two sons among others. So, today's plan was to get out of the house and grab a handful of copies of The Washington Post to add to my kids' scrapbooks.

Naturally, I waited until about 2pm to finally go searching for them, and wouldn't you know it, every grocery store, gas station, and cul de sac bodega is long since sold out. Seriously, it bordered on a maniacal obsession after the 5th Exxon station told me they had no more Posts. But I kept on driving, and parking, and getting out, and asking, and being told no, and repeating the whole cycle.

It was such a pathetic scene, it damn near looked like this.



This was hardly a banner hour in my life.

Anyways, I hit about 15 stores before wandering into a Subway restaurant out of sheer desperation.

As I'm walking into the Subway, I look down, and by the doorway, and there it is! A copy of today's Post, still in the plastic baggies they provide for those with home delivery. It's impossible to tell whether the paper belongs to the Subway owner or the drycleaners next door.

I'm processing about 2,000 different thoughts as I walk into the restaurant and ask the owner if they sell papers there. He says no. I turn and walk out the door, and the very newspaper I've driven 15 miles and made a dozen stops to find is lying right there at my feet, just begging to be taken.

I won't tell ya'll what I did until later, but I'll ask you in the meantime...

Question: What would you do? Would you steal the newspaper, knowing the store owner is probably looking right at you, or would you keep fruitlessly driving around looking for more papers?

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